friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
