When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
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