I'm going to jail i love you
Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
So much rum. So many feels.
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Randomize
