I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize