Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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