just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
Randomize
