who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
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