Pappa wants mamma naked
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
pop tarts are not kleenex
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
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