And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
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