Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
Randomize
