So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Randomize