I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
Randomize
