so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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