need another drink. this is the easiest way
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
Randomize