How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
