The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
Randomize
