I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
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