You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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