just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
