so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Randomize