At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Randomize
