im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
Last time i carry you out of a forest
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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