It's a beautiful day for a hangover
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
As shirtless as possible
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Randomize
