At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
tell me about the fingering
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