and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
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