He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
my god I love twenty year old dicks