If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
