I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize