Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
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