that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
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