I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Edward fifth and chaser hands
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
We have so much sex to catch up on
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
