Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
Randomize
