so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Randomize
