if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
Randomize