I heard we made out
I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
Also I think I drunkenly signed up to be an uber driver or something because they keep emailing me to fill out a background check
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize
