forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
I'm at about main and main street
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
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