I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize
