I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
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