Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Randomize