That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
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Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
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Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
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