How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Randomize
