So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Randomize