Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
