i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
Randomize
