trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
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