yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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