Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
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