either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
Randomize
