i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
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