i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
