Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
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