stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
The air taste purple.
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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